


this is how you want him

by wartransmission



Series: this is how (i love you) [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, Introspection, M/M, Second person POV, Yuuri POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 06:14:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9308876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wartransmission/pseuds/wartransmission
Summary: This is how you want him:graceful, beautiful,joyfulon the ice. You want him laughing, want him heart-full and blessed with warmth the same way you are ever since he burst into your life.





	

This is how you want him:

graceful, beautiful, _joyful_ on the ice. You want him laughing, want him heart-full and blessed with warmth the same way you are ever since he burst into your life. You want him happy, want him soft, want him surprised and ever-pleased at every new thing you throw his way.

You want him in love with you. You want him to be yours, greedy as it sounds, and you want him to want you the same way. Given the chance, with inhibitions removed and heart bared, your most selfish wish would be to have _him_ : his time, his desire, his love, his devotion, his gaze on you and you alone with no parts of him spared.

But your inhibitions are irremovable. Your anxiety is ever-present. Your heart is tied in knots around your own lungs, aching and scarred, and has only recently started healing in Viktor’s care. You are in love and happy, _true_ , but it does not vanquish the demon already residing in the spaces of your ribs since long ago.

 

 

This is how you love him:

heart-shaped mouth in a smile full of soft affection, arms clinging to your back, incessantly whiny in the most passive-aggressive manner possible in the mornings, and _yours_. You love him pushing you to try harder, love him when he’s understanding, love him when he doesn’t even know what you want but tries his hardest to do right by you anyway. You love him when he’s frustrated with you but remaining patient still, you love him even as he’s poking and prodding at your boundaries, you love him because he is who he is and there is no part of him that you will ever spare from your love, even if it’s the more annoying ( _“Yuuri, will you always keep me waiting longer than Aeroflot?”_ ), or hurtful (“ _Yuuri, I’ll take responsibility if you lose by resigning as your coach._ ”) parts of him.

You love him because you just _do_ , and he loves you much the same, even if you can’t (and possibly never will) understand it.

Viktor- not the Viktor on TV screens from a year ago, smile bland and body held up as if it were on strings- is in love with you. This Viktor, warm and soft and _everything_ you never expected you’d get in this lifetime or the next,  is in love. With you.

And you are in love with that. You love that he loves you in his own, small way- that he’s always, always so proud of you, that he _knows_ you can always do better next time. You love that he’s frank in his affection, love that he’s too much for your heart to take, love that he’s willing and eager to give his heart to you just because he already knows he has _yours_.

He wants you, flawed human being that you are, and you have never felt this full, never felt this happy, until the moment you realized he chose- he _chose_ , freely and with an open heart- to be with you because he _wants_ to, because he’s _in love with you_.

And you could say it again, again and again and again ( _Viktor is in love with me, Viktor loves me, he loves-_ ) but you don’t think your mind or your heart will ever manage to fully absorb it. Even with his heart already so near, so warm against yours,  the knowledge that he loves you enough to want your ring on his finger-

you never thought, never even _imagined_ in your wildest dreams, that he would love you at all, much less love you enough to want his life and heart _permanently tied_ to yours.

But he is.

He’s in love with you.

 

 

This is how you love him:

grin stretching wide on pink lips, blades gliding on star-bright ice, your hands and legs and heartbeats a beautiful mess of oneness in a dance that only he, and you, will ever understand this deeply.

**Author's Note:**

> i did this one again in Yuuri's POV bc 1. cultural difference, i guess? with regards to wanting- as a person coming from a culture where sex is either intensely fetishistic (bc of deep, deep, drawn-out culture-rooted-denial) or intensely NOT DONE (Or talked about. At. All.), I'm guessing Yuuri's definition of want would be on the more literal side instead of the sensual/sexual/etc.
> 
> 2\. because it's Yuuri, and i love him.
> 
> 3\. bc what the heck, why not?? i love these two, i love them being happy together, and i wanted to write on that. ♥
> 
> hmu on [twitter](https://twitter.com/jadedGalvanizer) or [tumblr](jadedgalvanizer.tumblr.com) if u want!!


End file.
